INTRODUCTION:

A. The theme of the lectureship is "The Valiant Man."
B. The word valiant means "a mighty one, force, strength, courage, etc."
 Before we can get to the heart of this lesson we must ask ourselves, "What do I really want my son to 
 become?"
D. During this lectureship we will study several men who were obviously brave men, men of strength, men  who were great leaders.
E. As you study these men, however, you will also see men of compassion, forgiveness, humble men who  were not afraid or ashamed to serve others.  Do we think of valiant men in these terms and do we think  about these attributes being important in the lives of our sons?
F. Much of what the world would consider as being important God would consider a hindrance (Study the  beatitudes in Matthew 5 and this will be borne out).
 Many times as fathers we dream of our sons being great athletes, high-powered business executives, 
 doctors, etc.  Many times we not only dream about this but we "encourage" our sons in this direction.
 We may "encourage' them to pursue activities that will bring them fame and possibly wealth, and we 
 may "discourage" any activity or  goal that won't produce these results.
I. Before this assignment I don't believe I had ever thought about training my son to be valiant.  I had,  though, thought about what I would like my son to become and it would involve this concept.
 I would like my son to be brave, kind, fair, honest, a servant, a leader.  These things do not just happen 
 by chance but must be instilled within the life of a person.  As fathers we have the responsibility of
  training our sons in these areas.
K. The Bible speaks repeatedly about parents' responsibility.
 a. I Timothy 5:8 - We must be concerned about the welfare of our families.
 b. Proverbs 13:22 - A good man will leave an inheritance to his children.
 c. Ephesians 6:4 - Fathers are to bring their children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
 I would imagine that most fathers are very concerned about providing materially and even leaving a 
 material inheritance to their children; but too few are concerned about providing the greater things of life  and leaving an inheritance far greater than silver and  gold.
M. How can we train our sons to be valiant?
DISCUSSION:
I.  INSTILL WITHIN THEM STRONG VALUES.
 A. This is a confusing time for young people.  What was once generally accepted to be wrong, evil,   and even "sinful," is now portrayed as acceptable.
  1. Fornication is "living together."
  2. Homosexuality is an "alternate lifestyle."
  3. Pornography is "adult literature."
 B. Our sons need to know that there is an absolute standard of moral conduct.  They need to know   that there are certain values that God expects Christians to uphold (Notice the example of
   Abraham in Genesis 18:19).
 C. What are some of these values?  (II Peter 1:5-8 would be a good place to start).
  1. Diligence.
  2. Faith.
  3. Virtue.
  4. Knowledge.
  5. Self-control.
  6. Perseverance.
  7. Godliness.
  8. Brotherly kindness.
  9. Love.
II. FATHERS MUST SET THE PROPER EXAMPLE.
 A. Jesus sternly rebuked the scribes and Pharisees because they would tell others how to live but   would not live that way themselves.  Nothing can be more damaging than for our sons to "hear"   us saying one thing and then "see" us doing  something else.
 B. In Proverbs 4 we are admonished to listen to the instructions of our fathers.  In verse 11 of the   chapter we read, "I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths.
 C. What example are we leaving our sons?
  1. In speech - Colossians 4:6.
  2. In honesty - II Corinthians 8:21.
  3. In morality - Titus 2:12.
  4. As head of your home - Ephesians 5:23.
  5. In standing for what is right and opposing what is wrong - I Thessalonians 5:21.
 D. This means we are going to have to spend some time with our sons.  It has been truthfully said   that we can commit child abuse without ever laying a hand on our children; just ignore them.
  1. I Thessalonians 2:11 - In order to follow this example we must spend time with our    sons.
  2. There is only a brief period of time in which our children will be under our "constant"    care.  Before we realize they will be grown and on their own.  We must make the most    of the time we have with them.
III. ENCOURAGE RESPONSIBILITY.
 A. This could possibly fall under either of the first two points, but there seems to be so much 
  misunderstanding in this area today that we need to deal with it separately.
  1. As you watch the news or read the paper or just listen to people talk, you soon get the    feeling that no one is responsible for anything anymore.
  2. From rioting, to children killing their parents or each other, to the problem of "AIDS";    we are told that individuals are not responsible for their actions.
  3. Even parents seem unwilling to accept responsibility for their children or teach their    children to be responsible.  If Johnny gets in trouble at school or gets a bad grade, it    can't possible be his fault; it has to be the fault of the school system.
 B. We must teach our children that they are responsible for their actions for the following reasons.
  1. One day they are going to have to give an account  (II Corinthians 5:10).
  2. They will give an account for their own actions, not  someone else (Ezekiel 18).
  3. They are to be an example to others (Matthew 5:13-16; Philippians 2:15).
  4. Because of Christ's example (I Peter 2:21-25).
 C. How do we teach our sons to be responsible?
  1. By teaching them to turn to God and His word when  making decisions or needing    guidance (Jeremiah 10:23; Proverbs 14:12; Philippians 4:13).
  2. As fathers we must expect them to be responsible.  As our sons grow older, they need 
   to be given more  responsibility with the understanding that we expect them to be 
   responsible.
  3. We must discipline our children (This would involve both positive instruction and 
   corrective measures also).  Remember Eli and his sons (I Samuel 2:12; 3:13).
 
CONCLUSION:

A. There are no doubt many other things that could be considered that are important for our sons to learn.
 Obviously, the most important factor is that they be reared to know God and God's word 
 (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).
 As men, we want to be successful in many areas of our lives.  Above all else we should desire to be 
 successful as fathers.  We should  want more than anything else to see our children and grandchildren  in heaven.  WE DARE NOT FAIL AS FATHERS!

        Steve Snider
        P. O. Box 753
        Barrackville, WV 26559